Well, that was fun.
Lucy and Molly, working as a team, managed to get into the cabinet where their treats are kept. Having accomplished her goal with the help of her sister, Lucy abandoned their partnership, grabbed a package of freeze-dried duck hearts, and made off with them.
At this point, the growling and snarling alerted me to trouble, and I came in to the kitchen to find a snarling, nearly mindless wild creature holding a package nearly as large as she is. She darted into my bedroom, but I chased her back out and shut the door.
I proceeded to chase her around the apartment for about ten minutes. I’d catch her and pick her up. She’d writhe and attempt to reach my hands with her back claws. She couldn’t bite me without dropping the package, but any attempt to pull it away from her was met with a claw attack on my hands.
Finally, knowing I couldn’t leave her to it, or she’d eat herself sick, and unable to get her to release it, I hauled her into the bathroom, turned on the bath faucet, and stuck her under the water.
This did not, as I hoped, shock her into dropping the package. At this point, she’d chewed a whole in the package, and began shaking her head wildly as I tried to pull it away.
Result: duck hearts flung all over the bathroom while we continued to fight over the now-empty package. She eventually realized it was empty, dropped it, and lunged for a duck heart. (In the midst of all of this, a gray paw slipped under the door and palmed a heart, then vanished. Molly usually stays calm and cool while Lucy goes nuts over food, and wins out.)
I grabbed my soaking wet, still-snarling kitty and tossed her out of the bathroom so that I could clean up my bathroom, which looked like a scene from a horror movie.
She’s now sitting on my knee, returned to normal, trying to dry off and feeling very sorry for herself.